A Letter RE: Disney Remakes

As for a lead, what if we switch it up? I’m thinking The Rock as the mer-man, and maybe Amy Adams as an organic wholesale fruit and vegetable shop owner.

Allen Bauer, meet “Allie Bauer”.

And the government has to be the bad guy. Scientists were bad guys in 1980, but now I’m thinking a power-hungry Homeland Security manager or – ooh, ooh, Senator (people still hate the government, right?). Eugene Levy could play Senator Walter Kornbluth who wants to control the mer-man for, I dunno, a weapon. And he doesn’t want to be a weapon, he just wants to cruise around San Francisco bay all day long.

The Jonas Brothers could play a song.

Zac Efron as the John Candy role. But less womanizing.

Zack and Cody from the Suite Life of Zack & Cody could be the wacky neighbors.

Selena Gomez could be the mer-man’s daughter (he’s a widower).

And I keep forgetting, is Miley Cyrus done with Disney, or not? If she’s still around, we could work a role (and a song) in for her. And if she is done with Disney, does she have any siblings? If not, can you talk to Billy Ray about getting another Cyrus or two?

What am I saying, he’s from Kentucky, he’s got to have a few more legitimate (or otherwise) kids around. Do some snooping. Find his high school, er, middle school girlfriend.

So what do you say? Are you with me? Splash, coming in 2013 from Walt Disney Pictures??

Have your people call my people.

Sincerely,

Josh Edwards

PS – Go Wildcats!

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